Investigating the drinks cabinet

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Planning part 2

So far, the following have been allocated. December is Gluttony, January is Sloth and either July or August for Lust. This leaves Anger, Pride, Envy and Greed to go.

After careful deliberation, I’ve decided that Anger is the easiest to start off with and is a nice way of easing myself into this adventure. There are plenty of things in the world that anger me so purely from the point of view that I should start with what I know best, I’ve decided that July shall be my month of ‘living’ anger.

This of course makes August my month of lust- here’s going that we’ll have a sunny warm month.

The last three sins, Greed, Envy and Pride are harder to allocate than the first four so I apologise now if my justifications are weak.

As it is my birthday in October, a time when one usually gets presents from one’s loved ones, I’ve decided that Greed should be for that month as it’s a perfect chance to indulge my material desires.

This also helps determine the month for Envy as September seeing as I’ll most likely be spending the month before my birthday looking at all the stuff I want (coveting them, if you will). Now, you may think this sound self-indulgent, but this is a blog, what else do you expect?

This leaves November for Pride. I can think of no real justification for this, it’s just going to have to be by default. I do still have a few months to think about it though so I may well invent some sort of imaginative bollocks as an excuse. It’s the month of Pride, so be warned that I’ll proclaim even the poorest idea as genius.

The seven months for the seven sins are as follows then:

July: Anger
August: Lust
September: Envy
October: Greed
November: Pride
December: Gluttony
January: Sloth

Planning

If there is anything that can be learnt from J K Huysman’s ‘A Rebours‘ it is that it is always worth planning something in advance if you want to get the most out of it. Now, we should not be put of by the fact that by the end of the story Des Esseintes has to return to Paris after his escapist plans fall through as this turn of events is through no lack of planning and is as a result of his own poor health (the best laid plans of mice and all that). If everyone were to fear taking a course of action purely because there were potential health concerns related to it, where would our darling tobacco and alcohol manufactures be today? And one should not be put off by the thought of setbacks and recriminations either and in fact it is better to consider these in advance and prepare for them in an attempt to prevent them from occurring. If such preparations hadn’t occured at the Château de Silling, then subsequent goings on might have been compromised when the less willing participants attempt to leave.

So, planning my endeavour in advance is necessary and I’m going to let you in on a few of my thought processes, as that’s the sort of thing you’re supposed to do on a blog and I’m sure it would be a lot more interesting to read about as opposed to me going into graphic detail as to my breakfast which this morning at least was wholly unremarkable (yoghurt and a banana if you really must know. I had a cup of some rather nice Huo Shan Yellow tea with it. Happy now?).

The main issue to be resolved is the order that the sins will be ‘attempted’. For clarification’s sake, the sins are: Anger, Greed, Lust, Pride, Envy, Gluttony and Sloth. The month’s that they will be taking place in are July 2011 to January 2012. For some of the Sins, the allocations of the months are relitively easy.

Christmas and by extension December has always struck more as a month of gluttony than anything else. I know we’re told it’s about goodwill on earth and the baby Jesus and family and all that stuff but I can’t help but feel that we could have all those things without necessarily shoving quite so much turkey, chocolates, ten different types of roast vegetables, cake, pudding, booze and the obligatory satsuma down our throats. So it only seems logical to me to fully embrace the gluttony of the time and make a total pig of myself for the last month of the year.

It is customary after a heavy Christmas dinner to have a bit of a nap so after a whole month of indulgence, I can’t help feeling that a month of sleeping and lazying around will hardly be a challenge and when it comes to being slothful, challenges are to be avoided! It seems only sensible then that January would be a perfect month for revelling in that particular vice.

It’s a lot easier to be lustful when naked flesh is on display so the summer months fit nicely with that sin what with peoples of both gender stripping off to enjoy the sunshine. Either July or August would be best for Lust then.

The remaining four sins will be discussed in a later entry as and when I get round to composing it.